In the first Xenoblade, (the 3ds version if it matters) do I need to attack every enemy? I am struggling a lot with the larger enemies.
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No you don't need to, try to avoid them until you have levelled up enough to beat them, same goes for X.
Nah. Tons of tough enemies out the gate. Especially the infamous Territorial Rotbart. Avoid unique monsters (enemies with more complex nameplate borders, shiny in DE) until you hit like level 10 if you don't want a tougher fight.
If the color of their tag is red, don't engage. If you feel underleveled, do some sidequests.