I don't get how people have crushes. Like one day, a guy/girl decides "Wow that person is hot/cute, I'm going to become a borderline stalker!" For me, I've never had a crush. At most, just a hug would be nice. I never get any affection any more. Guys don't get that nowadays.
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Especially me and my autistic butt (I'm actually autistic, don't strike me down mods) I just hate being like this. No one understands me, I can't keep friends longer than a month, and the only people that seem to want to be friends are either seriously mentally ill, or pervs.
And on top of what I said, guys cannot hug other guys according to societal standards, as it is "Super gay" according to guys. I mean I do not want to hug any of my male friends as that rule is written in stone. No one even wants to talk to me anymore unless it benefits them.
But, I don't have ANY FRIENDS! No one! I've ALWAYS been on my own. No matter what environment I'm in. Never. Now I know some people are gonna say in the comments "Just go out more! Speak up" or "Aww don't worry! It will get better!" But it won't. It never will.
With every year that ticks by, my life gets worse. Every year. First I got depression, them my dad "checked out", I fell into a deep depression, had to go to a mental facility where everyone fought every day, then I had to go back to school and pretend everything was okay.
No one understands. No one has, no one will.
jus lock in
miiverse btw
The same social rules make others turn having a crush into harassment. I can't blame you, but just let you know that rejecting said rules is rebel and awesome (I would say more, like "it gets better", but you already mentioned and denied it and i'm not good at promises)
notice how i dont care <3
i hope ur okay though i was joking hehe no seriously i hope you get better and im sorry you went through that <3